"I believe dumb men who like smart women aren't dumb at all! However, does a smart women want to live the rest of her life with a dumb man?"

Note: This will be my last post, as I am planning to transfer to another location. Meaning, I will still keep on blogging, but under another account and another name.

While reading through ASW posts, I came across this thread "Smart men don't like smart women"... and vice versa. Of course, there are so many opinions, etc... As for me? Really? I like men who are smarter than me, though, not people who are dumb. Which reminds me of this crazy American, who bombarded me with text messages a few days before he left Philippines... I will never, ever forget the experience... This is what I get for associating myself with mentally disturbed people... Sure, I already told him he is retarded, stupid, etc, (how evil I was) simply to fend off his courting. You see, even though he already told me that I would be a crappy girlfriend/wife, that still did not stop him from harassing me with "sweet" text messages. Why I do not like him? I am typing the reasons below:

1. I really have no plans to have a boyfriend. I prefer being single. My plan is to become like Queen Elizabeth 1. This is not simply because of some trauma in the past, but because... I really want to become a great person someday. I believe I can do more things if I am single. The same happened with Jesus.

2. He was just a friend for me. He could have been a very good best friend... a confidante... but he spoiled everything. He wanted something more than friendship, something I could not give. I explained that to him for a lot of times... first, with a very calm manner... then when that did not stop him from disturbing me, I started to become nasty, shouting him in public simply to humiliate him (I like being evil, I guess :-p )... still, that did not stop him from sending a text message... "...No one deserves me more than you." EEEEK! Yeaarrgh! The horror!

3. He is plainly stupid. I don't really go for stupid guys. Though I did not tell him in person that we don't have the same level of IQ (he did not even know where Eiffel Tower was located till I told him), I believe he already noticed how I treated him. I already told him he was "Retarded," like a lot of times... that is, after I became evil to him. Whenever we would have discussions... I could not find any interesting topic to talk about... He likes anime... sure, I like anime, but I'm not as knowledgeable about that childhood love as he... what else? He doesn't know who Rip Van Winkle is... He does not watch news... he is an American, all right, so he must have access to the best educational system in the world... and yet, he is not simply that guy. Actually, he could not enter Harvard, Yale, etc. simply because he does not have the grade and the brain... Well, I'm not really looking for people who entered prestigious university, even though I came from a prestigious university, har har, looking for the same blood... Still, if I were to have a boyfriend (which is most unlikely, as I am fending off attraction), I would like someone whom I could talk to about a lot of things. And aside anime, his other favorite topic is sex... like, he likes to talk about sex in a childlike manner... he likes to do it... he would request for it. Of course, we did it, but I made sure he paid for the motel bills, as in the first place, I did not request for it... Aside being retarded, he is immature. 21 years old, really no-brainer...

But then... this reminds me of this old guy who came from a prestigious university... "breathing down your neck..." sure, it could be a friendly gesture... but for me, it's icky.

4. He is not a gentleman. He thinks paying for things bought, food, etc. is a way of being a gentleman. Maybe he needs to read a "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus," but due to his limited capacity of understanding, I wonder if he will be patient with that type of book. But then, he is not your ideal man. He will not carry your bags (unless you're a very old woman... and I doubt he will do that even with old women... he is, like, subnormal, he won't even notice his surroundings), hold out his arm for you to hold, open the door for you... He is not a gentleman... I won't wonder if he reaches 50 without a wife or girlfriend because... he is simply not man enough... Pathetic, yes, but what can I do? He does not even want to change himself... I already told him about this, he gave his reasons... whatever...

Which reminds me... I am invited to this birthday on August 13th :-) Birthday of an Indian friend :-) (and I thought she totally ignored me after many days). Ok, I will attend...

Now back to the crazy American... he is crazy because... 1. He got out of the army due to anxiety disorder, 2. He bombarded me with text messages even though I clearly told him to stop sending me text messages like a lot of times, 3. He would email me, saying things that would annoy me... he likes getting hurt and getting depressed, maybe.

Now, why he liked me? Reasons that he gave were like, 1. I am wise, to be honest, wiser than him, 2. I am hard to be pleased... guess he likes being challenged.

The worst of all this: He is hoping for us to meet again after 5 years. God... I pray to God... that within 5 years, even though it may sound impossible due to his character, he has found a regular job and the love of his life... any nationality is ok, as long as it is not me... and I sincerely hope I do not meet him for the rest of his and/or my life... He is a creep, with the possibility to become a stalker... He has all the symptoms, that is why I blocked him from all of my social networking accounts... He destroyed my trust after the incident, i.e. bombarding me with text messages and reminding me of his "help" for my candidacy... which reminds me, the people he asked for to help me - did not contact me. Even this landlady, who said there was a gay man who would help me - did not contact me. Actually, I think it is much better if I did not receive any kind of help given by the crazy American. It is not etiquette-wise if I did receive. The only help I got from him: one vote for the Facebook application plus some envelopes that I had not been able to use... Well, I will thank him for this, but not for what he did...

Wahat in daha world!

Feeling funny... guess most of the guys really like sex. Like some of them, all they can think of is sex... I am laughing my head off - ha ha ha ha!

Ok, that's cruel :-p But guess I am giving them their karma :-p

Ok, that's really cruel.

Not wanting to do this...

But since I have a deadline to meet... I guess I should resort to plan B now... a plan that will be well executed without the harm of thinking what in the world I am doing...

Desperation...

Looking for ways to earn money for the fund raising without the hassle of going out and asking each and everyone... not sure why, but years ago, I felt ok with it... but now, I feel too old for it... staying under the baked heat of the sun simply to ask people for a minute of their attention...

And now, also cheating online... though I know I would get Karma out of this...

Reminds me, have to write a letter for ALIG sooner or later... that is my only hope...

The other one, that is, a gay man to give a donation, more like, whether possible or not...

Well... I still have my lessons... but come to think of it... also have to think of my passport... and what else? Visa... to be honest, after many years, and the times of losing my money because of some people taking it away from me, which lost my willingness to save... I recently started to save money again... P100 per earning... wow...

And I should apologize...

For no apparent reason... after confronting my cousin... and telling trusted people about what happened to my wallet... it turned up all of a sudden... what? Did I not look that hard? I mean, I was not blind... It turned up all of a sudden...! Money intact, IDs intact...

My 2nd sis said it could be: 1. Ghosts, 2. Elves, 3. My cousin

Ha ha... Elves... she said a lot of times it already happened to her... Like she lost her ring one time, then she looked around... she could not find it... so she said to no one, only inside of our room, to return the ring... later, after coming from an event, she saw the ring right on the bed.

Geez... I don't know... All I know is that I looked real hard to find my wallet. I was not blind. It was not there last Tuesday when I looked for it... then all of a sudden, it mysteriously appeared yesterday morning... Was I only blind when I was looking for it? No, can't be... Because I truly searched...

Anyway, though I still have to apologize to my cousin, my sisters said I should not give gifts, whatever, as way of saying sorry... as I already told them I would treat my cousin for this Harry Potter movie... Like saying, just let it be... still, I will say sorry, though maybe no promise of Harry Potter movie...

I lost my wallet.... I might even lose my future...

I lost my wallet... which was located inside of my bag... my bag was located inside of our room... suspect: my cousin, who happens to be a kleptomaniac... P400... four hundred pesos... plus IDs... my fucking IDs!!!! ...Voter's ID... BDO Cash Card... damn... I lost lots of things... meaning...

1. I should get new Voter's ID
2. I should get an ID to get salary from Western Union
3. Apply for a new bank account
4. Forget saving money for now, as have to make up for the lost P400
5. Return the P350 to this former student
6. Pray ill for my cousin. Hope she gets swine flu now or something.

I don't want to be angry... but I lost a lot of things... lots... like losing your future... this is not karma, I know... though, well, could be... for being mean to a boy who happened to like me very much... it just so happens that I was not careful enough...

On a good note, a friend greeted me via my Facebook wall... A friend who has not spoken to me for a long time... :-)

Still... my wallet... and the thought of thinking where to get funds... for my candidacy... And the fact that the friends of the boy, who said the people he trusted would contact me for pledges, have not made any communication whatsoever... Note: forget their pledges.

And my wallet... I have a lot of things to think of... My wallet... My wallet... My wallet... I just want to strangle my cousin for doing it... Would like to tell her to get a job or something... My wallet... may it rest in peace... Ok, think positive... it will be returned...

Atonement

Last time, instead of promoting the candidacy profile of a fellow countrywoman, I promoted the profile of a Nepalese that I could not even remember the name... and it was because of my greed to stay on the top... Up to now, I still remember what I did...

I was never number one when I was a child. Never number one in elementary, in highschool, in university... in this college, I only became number one because... people were kind... even though deep in my heart, I felt I did not deserve it... Now I am number one among fellowmen when it comes to voting, and I want to stay that way... That want that led me do something dirty...

And now, I am a candidate for this newly-established international organization... A candidate to become a delegate... and I did a dirty work...

And now that karma is happening... though I don't know what kind of karma is happening to me right now, as something bad happens and, at the same time, something good happens... I guess an atonement has to be paid by me...

I am sure this is not the way to greatness... If I truly want to become a great person... guess I have to admit my mistake... After this, I shall promote the profile of this fellow woman, who, even though truly threatens my position, deserves something good for once...